Jokes please

sarathy · 2007-05-30, 09:13

Any one with new set of jokes? Long time since I've read one.

ThaClown · 2007-07-12, 14:20

I was doing the nasty with my girlfriend, when she asked me to talk about dirty things...

I replied: "The kitchen, living room, bathroom and my clothes! Get to work!"

Avigrace · 2007-07-12, 19:04

Why did the baker have smelly hands?

He kneaded a poo

nunyabidz · 2007-07-13, 06:08

A husband and wife were sharing a bottle of wine when the husband said, "I bet you can't tell me something which will make me happy and sad at the same time."

The wife thought for a few moments, then said, "Your dick's bigger
than your brother's".

NickName · 2007-07-13, 06:39

Q. Why did the computer cross the road?

A. It was programmed by a chicken!

Hey, nobody said they had to be good jokes, hehe, ;-)

Grayda · 2007-07-14, 07:39

I have SO many jokes, but most are inappropriate for here, unless people like hearing jokes about fornicating octopuses and such, but here's a semi-decent one ;P

A man walks into a bar with a crocodile. He sits down at the bar and says to the people around him "I have a crocodile. And I have a proposition for you. I will attempt to stick my genitals into the crocodile's mouth. If I can survive the ordeal, you must buy me a drink each!". The crowd around him mumbles and agrees. So he stands up, drops his pants and proceeds to stick his bits into the crocodile's mouth. The crocodile bites down and the crowd gasps. Finally he picks up a bottle and hits the croc over the head and the crocodile releases it's grip. He pulls his pants back up and accepts drinks from the crowd. After the crowd settles down, he stands up and announces again "I will give one thousand dollars to the next person who can do what I just did!". The room goes silent and everyone looks away. Finally a woman steps forward and says "I'll do it.. if you promise not to hit me over the head with the bottle"

har har har :|

Spragleknas · 2007-07-18, 15:50

Quote:

Originally Posted by nunyabidz

A husband and wife were sharing a bottle of wine when the husband said, "I bet you can't tell me something which will make me happy and sad at the same time."

The wife thought for a few moments, then said, "Your dick's bigger
than your brother's".

GREAT FIRST POST

2007-05-30, 09:13	#1 (permalink)
sarathy Portal User Join Date: Jan 2007 Posts: 2 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Country:	Jokes please Any one with new set of jokes? Long time since I've read one.

2007-07-12, 14:20	#2 (permalink)
ThaClown MP Donator Join Date: May 2006 Location: Amersfoort Age: 27 Posts: 655 Thanks: 125 Thanked 14 Times in 12 Posts Country: My System	Sorry ladies, it's just a joke I was doing the nasty with my girlfriend, when she asked me to talk about dirty things... I replied: "The kitchen, living room, bathroom and my clothes! Get to work!" __________________ Work PC: Lian Li V2100 B Plus II Black, Asus P5E , Intel Core 2 Quad Q6600, Arctic Freezer 7 Pro, 250 GB, 3x 500 GB, Tagan TG480 480W, GeForce 8600GTS Silent, 4096 MB DDR2, Vista Ulitmate x64. Server PC: Some black Midi case, MSI K9AGM2, Athlon XP 3200+, AC CPU Freezer 64 lp, CM Silent Case Fan, 512MB DDR2, HighPoint RocketRAID 2320, 4x Samsung HDD 1TB 32MB SATAII in RAID5, FireDTV-C, Windows XP pro. My second build...

2007-07-13, 06:08	#4 (permalink)
nunyabidz Portal User Join Date: Jul 2007 Age: 46 Posts: 1 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Country:	Ah great! My first post! A husband and wife were sharing a bottle of wine when the husband said, "I bet you can't tell me something which will make me happy and sad at the same time." The wife thought for a few moments, then said, "Your dick's bigger than your brother's".

2007-07-13, 06:39	#5 (permalink)
NickName Portal Member Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Gold Coast Posts: 283 Thanks: 13 Thanked 5 Times in 3 Posts Country:	Q. Why did the computer cross the road? A. It was programmed by a chicken! Hey, nobody said they had to be good jokes, hehe, ;-) __________________ Before, I could never finish anything I started but now I

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2007-07-12, 19:04	#3 (permalink)
Avigrace Portal Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 69 Thanks: 9 Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts Country:	Why did the baker have smelly hands? He kneaded a poo

2007-07-14, 07:39	#6 (permalink)
Grayda Portal Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Near Melbourne, Australia Age: 22 Posts: 46 Thanks: 2 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Country: My System	I have SO many jokes, but most are inappropriate for here, unless people like hearing jokes about fornicating octopuses and such, but here's a semi-decent one ;P A man walks into a bar with a crocodile. He sits down at the bar and says to the people around him "I have a crocodile. And I have a proposition for you. I will attempt to stick my genitals into the crocodile's mouth. If I can survive the ordeal, you must buy me a drink each!". The crowd around him mumbles and agrees. So he stands up, drops his pants and proceeds to stick his bits into the crocodile's mouth. The crocodile bites down and the crowd gasps. Finally he picks up a bottle and hits the croc over the head and the crocodile releases it's grip. He pulls his pants back up and accepts drinks from the crowd. After the crowd settles down, he stands up and announces again "I will give one thousand dollars to the next person who can do what I just did!". The room goes silent and everyone looks away. Finally a woman steps forward and says "I'll do it.. if you promise not to hit me over the head with the bottle" har har har :\|